Parakalein

Betrayal grips my soul and threatens the very life out of me. Maybe this is the nature of betrayal. When we feel betrayed we become the betrayer. We betray ourselves because we see the hatred of the betrayal. We think we need a release. Anything that provides comfort in this place of betrayal we grab on to it, holding it for dear life. Then it betrays our living, our hoping our loving.

Betrayal is cruel because it is perennial. Like death it is everywhere.

Death betrays life. It betrays the “living, loving Spirit” in all of us. We speak of death as being God’s will and I scream a deep scream from the pit of my being.

Death is not God’s will. It never has been God’s will.

The betrayal began with the idea that the God of creation was not for love and peace but for power and control. The enemy of betrayal suggested that God had a protective part that did not want us to know as God knows, love as God loves, live free as God is free. Our thoughts betrayed us because we felt betrayed which resulted in betrayal.

We are the betrayer and the betrayed. There is no innocence.

I have felt betrayed and I have betrayed the love and life that I hold so dear. Life is not as important as honor and integrity. What we believe effects our living and our living infects what we believe.

When death came to my brother it cut into all of our hearts. Some have spoken of it as God’s will. While screaming in pain of grief and loss, they embrace a God that embraces them with comfort. This is to their credit and faith.

I see that moment as betrayal. Death betrayed the love and life my brother had lived. When the “angel of death” came to him, I do not think he said okay let’s go without also saying my heart is breaking for my wife, my children my grandchildren. Then my brother, full of grace, said I trust you to be “with” my family. Entrusting them to God’s loving care and living peace.

Betrayal blinds me. Faith that sees beyond the moment and sees everyone in the loving and peaceful way that God sees us sets us free from all burdens of beliefs and betrayals. Some beliefs perpetuate betrayal. Others set us free of the burden of betrayal.

We think it is about who is right or honorable so we set ourselves to judge others and ourselves with a hammer of judgment. We think it is about “truth” some particular truth about this or that. We betray our loving and living.

The inner self as God has given it to all of us looks at the betrayal of the part and has deep understanding and compassion for why the part behaved in this way. There is no judgment or condemnation. There is also no approval or condoning. There is just the abiding presence of love and peace. There, there is healing and life forevermore.