I was recently at an IFS Conference that focused on healthy togetherness and came up with the following plan for a Couple's Retreat:
Blending together the principles of Internal Family Systems and Parakalein System of Being into redefining being a couple, a family, and Global Community of Life and Faith
Three Principles woven as a cord of three strands, a stance of three ideas into a dance of intimacy
1. All parts in all people are All Welcome
2. The SELF is an inner and eternal essence of healing, hope, honor, honesty, and humility. It is an agency of peace and love without agendas except to nurture peace and love
3. All parts are invited to, called to, and created for an "alongside of and with" all other parts in balance and harmony that promotes togetherness.
Summary: Polarization and paralysis are the natural reactions of a disharmonious system of opposite parts. While it is not the intention of a part oppose another part it is often the belief of a part. Oppositional defiance and oppositional compliance are equally unhealthy to any system. A system is healthy when opposites are seen not as compensatory opposites but as complimentary opposites.
Parallels and propellants of community are the natural reactions of an harmonious system that welcomes all parts, all experiences, all burdens, and all beliefs as one. Burdens that propel disharmony are released of their burden. Beliefs that propel disharmony are shifted to beliefs that promote healing and wholeness for all so we become one yet many, many yet one.
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